#5 Making Changes For a Great 2024 - Who's In Your Circle?

Your Circle of Influence is up to you...or is it?

Last week in our fill-in-th-blank New Year series where I’m just giving you some HNY prompts that came to me in prayer… yes, I have to answer them too, I started talking about your Circle of Influence. I didn’t make that term up… it’s been bandied about by many influencers and writers and sponsers and therapists etc. It’s a great visual though and is very helpul in seeing just how things move or get moved around.

This term first came up in conversation with a friend several months ago, then another friend who’d been talking about it with a counselor. It didn’t just interest me. It fed me. So here we are today

And look how that influence worked… I believe it to be of good fruit or I wouldn’t be sharing it now… and that’s where we need to be aware; when the influence is a basket of withered dry dead figs.

Or a sows ear dressed up like a silk purse.

When I moved from the Northeast back to the Southwest I was immediately thrust into more isolation than I’d bargained. That’s what it feels like because #change.

But even before I moved I felt things/people pulling away and also needing to be - well the kindest way to put it would be to say that the great and powerful Pause Button was pressed.

THE CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE

The Circle of Influence, as I understand it, looks like concentric circles. From the center out are those people that are nearest to those who are in the outer limits.

Some are rock solid. Some you think are rock solid until

1. they move

2. you move them

3. or they are moved by the hand of God

Look at all of those variables! A friend of mine has a theory that this happens often when big changes, obvious changes, are afoot.

THEY MOVE

I moved. I left some physically left those in my vicinity for the last 5-8 years. I did the moving. That didn’t mean that they had to leave the areas in the circle they held but it does mean the balance changes. Some have faded. Some have chosen to shift. For me to force them back into the concentric circle they used to be in would cause stress and prove an unwillingness to allow necessary change in my life - being open to what God is doing.

YOU MOVE THEM

This one is harder. And is so entwined with #3 that it’s hard to divide them. But sometimes a relationship, habit, or _____ just cannot accompany you to the next season of your life (maybe it hasn’t been able to for a while but you had these rules in your head about it or them) they must be “moved” to a different part of the Circle of Influence - in other words, they aren’t give the weight to influence you they way they used to. Perhaps not the time and energy, physical or verbal. Perhaps they must go to the outer limits. Some have to drop off the circle entirely.

THEY ARE MOVED BY THE HAND OF GOD

If you are in a constrant inner struggle about - let’s just say an influence - why you just cannot jibe anymore or the tennis ball going back and forth - the constant struggle… consider this.

God is moving this influence out of your inner circle and you are fighting Him to keep the influence on the inside.

God moves people in and out of our lives for our good because He is good and knows what He is about.

If that is so, then try prayer and obedience.

THIS HAPPENED TO ME

Back to my personal experience with this. In this season of change and transition I have realized to my shock (and horror) that some cannot travel with me. Yes, it was a horrifying reality because God asked me to shut down some influences in this change that I would not have though in a million years I would do.

After much struggle (because of my unwillingness to participate in God’s purpose), angst, fear, dread, guilt, sadness, and rebellion - I threw my towel into the ring.

After much reflection it occured to me - and I say this after getting over the lie that I was excusing myself - that is was as much for me as for the other. Maybe more for the other(s).

But then, that’s none of my business.

And as he is moving one out, He moves more in… or he doesn’t… and then we get into desert stories but we’ll stop here.

DRAW YOUR CIRCLE OF INFLUENCERS

Visuals are always helpful. Don’t show anyone. Just draw concentric circles and in the center put “God”, then move out from there. Who is moving? Who needs to move? Who is God moving and you’re acting like a wild bronco in a fit to get the saddle off?

Who are you influencing and did God ask you to be there?